ADHD in Girls: Why It’s Often Missed and What to Look For
As a Licensed Educational Psychologist who conducts ADHD evaluations throughout the South Bay beach cities—including Manhattan Beach, Hermosa Beach, Redondo Beach, Torrance, El Segundo, and Palos Verdes Peninsula—I see a troubling pattern: girls with ADHD are consistently underdiagnosed and identified much later than boys, often not until adolescence or adulthood. Understanding why ADHD in girls is missed and what signs to look for can help parents and educators recognize female ADHD earlier, leading to better support and outcomes.
The ADHD Gender Gap: Why Girls Are Missed
⚠️ The Statistics on ADHD in Girls
Boys are diagnosed with ADHD 2-3x more often than girls
Girls with ADHD are identified 5 years later than boys on average
But this doesn’t mean boys actually have ADHD more frequently—it means girls are being overlooked. Studies suggest that when objective measures are used rather than teacher referrals, the rates of ADHD in boys and girls are much more similar.
Girls with ADHD are typically identified 5 years later than boys, often not until middle school, high school, or even adulthood. By this time, they’ve often developed anxiety, depression, or serious self-esteem issues from years of struggling without understanding why.
Why ADHD in Girls and Women Is Missed
1️⃣ Different ADHD Symptoms
Boys: Hyperactive, impulsive, disruptive behaviors that get noticed
Girls: Inattentive ADHD symptoms like daydreaming, appearing spacey, disorganization—easily overlooked
2️⃣ Internalized Struggles
Girls with ADHD internalize difficulties, developing anxiety and depression rather than acting out behaviorally
3️⃣ Better Compensation
Girls develop sophisticated coping strategies that mask ADHD symptoms until demands increase in middle/high school
4️⃣ Gender Expectations
Society expects girls to be organized and attentive. Those who aren’t are labeled “ditsy” or “not trying”
5️⃣ Adequate Grades Hide ADHD
High intelligence compensates for ADHD. Girls work much harder for “fine” grades, hiding the struggle
What ADHD Actually Looks Like in Girls
Instead of the stereotypical hyperactive boy, ADHD in girls often presents as:
🧠 Inattentive ADHD Symptoms in Girls
- Difficulty sustaining attention on tasks, even ones they want to complete
- Appearing to not listen when spoken to directly
- Failing to finish schoolwork, chores, or other tasks
- Difficulty with organization and planning
- Avoiding tasks requiring sustained mental effort
- Frequently losing things (homework, school supplies, personal items)
- Easily distracted by internal thoughts or external stimuli
- Forgetful in daily activities
💭 Subtle Hyperactivity in Female ADHD
- Talking excessively (though not disruptively)
- Internal restlessness or feeling “driven by a motor”
- Fidgeting with hands or feet (playing with hair, picking at nails)
- Excessive doodling or note-passing
😢 Emotional Dysregulation in Girls with ADHD
- Intense emotional reactions that seem disproportionate
- Difficulty managing frustration or disappointment
- Quick to cry or become upset
- Mood swings throughout the day
- Rejection sensitivity—taking criticism very personally
📅 Executive Function Challenges
- Chronic difficulty with time management
- Problems with prioritization
- Struggles with planning and following through
- Underestimating time needed for tasks
- Procrastination followed by last-minute panic
ADHD Signs by Age: What to Look For in Your Daughter
Elementary School Girls with ADHD (Ages 6-10)
- Described as “daydreamer” or “spacey”
- Messy desk and disorganized backpack
- Forgetting homework despite knowing it
- Taking much longer than peers to complete work
- May be well-behaved but not absorbing material
Middle School Girls with ADHD (Ages 11-13)
- Increased academic struggles as organization demands increase
- Rising anxiety about school performance
- Bedroom and school materials extremely disorganized
- Difficulty managing multiple teachers and classes
- Emerging self-esteem issues
High School Girls with ADHD (Ages 14-18)
- Previously good grades beginning to drop
- Overwhelming feelings of being “behind” or inadequate
- Anxiety or depression developing
- Chronic lateness and time management issues
- May begin to give up or become oppositional
⚠️ The Long-Term Impact of Undiagnosed ADHD in Girls
When ADHD in girls goes unrecognized, the consequences extend far beyond childhood:
- Chronic low self-esteem from years of feeling “not good enough”
- Anxiety disorders from constant stress of trying to keep up
- Depression from repeated experiences of failure and criticism
- Academic underachievement despite strong potential
- Relationship problems from impulsivity and emotional dysregulation
- Higher rates of eating disorders, self-harm, and substance use
“Many women I evaluate in adulthood describe years of thinking they were ‘lazy,’ ‘stupid,’ or ‘broken’ before finally understanding their ADHD.”
✅ When Should You Seek ADHD Testing for Your Daughter?
Consider ADHD evaluation if your daughter:
- Shows a significant discrepancy between ability and performance
- Works much harder than peers for similar results
- Has been described as “spacey,” “in her own world,” or “not paying attention”
- Struggles with organization despite many attempted systems
- Frequently forgets or loses things
- Has difficulty completing tasks even when motivated
- Shows signs of anxiety or depression related to school performance
- Expresses feelings of inadequacy or being “different”
- Has immediate family members with ADHD (it’s highly heritable)
- Previously performed well but struggles when demands increase
What Does ADHD Testing Include?
A comprehensive ADHD evaluation for girls in the South Bay should include:
- Clinical Interview: Detailed discussion of developmental history and current concerns
- Rating Scales: Standardized questionnaires from parents, teachers, and the student
- Cognitive Assessment: Testing to rule out other explanations and identify strengths
- Academic Achievement Testing: Identifying learning difficulties that may co-occur
- Executive Function Measures: Assessing planning, organization, and self-regulation
- Emotional/Behavioral Assessment: Screening for anxiety, depression, or other co-occurring conditions
- Observation: Watching how your daughter approaches tasks and manages attention
Concerned Your Daughter May Have ADHD? Get Answers in the South Bay
If you’re in Hermosa Beach, Manhattan Beach, Redondo Beach, Torrance, El Segundo, Palos Verdes Peninsula, or anywhere in the South Bay and suspect your daughter may have ADHD, I provide comprehensive ADHD evaluations specifically designed to identify ADHD in girls and inattentive ADHD presentations that are often missed.
Early identification leads to better outcomes. Contact me today to schedule an ADHD evaluation.